[Clemency] When rapper John Fortè was caught with 31 pounds of an exotic-sounding substance called "liquid cocaine," his only recourse was to call on his hip-ass friends in the music industry--friends like our very own mover and shaker Sen. Orrin Hatch, who you might remember from his hit John McCain single "He Flies Like an Eagle" or "That Old Bastard Glides Just Like an Eagle Does" or some bullshit like that. Also, such musicians as Carole King got onboard the Fortè bandwagon. Or was it Carly Simon? [Vid note: wait for it ...]
To tell the truth, I'm so old I'd never heard of John Fortè. But, apparently, these days, he's getting credit for Nena's "99 Luftballons" or something (I don't understand how that works--I remember the song being popular when he was 8 years old), but never mind. He's obviously hip/happenin' and the upshot is that Fortè has been pardoned by none other than paraplegic-duck-in-chief George W. Bush.
So, congratulations, John Fortè. Nice to know you're so well-connected. (The Carly Simon thing really impresses me, but I'm still puzzled about how Orrin got involved.) Truthfully, I still prefer Nena's version, but get off my lawn. Maybe for your next project you can ruin Ebn Ozn's "AEIOU Sometimes Y." Here it is for reference: