Friday, November 28, 2008

Now shop, damn you! Shop like like wind!

[Economy] Shopping is good for the economy, and it is our patriotic duty to rescue the economy by taking advantage of this Black Friday (apparently Congress' multibillion-dollar bailouts haven't done the trick, since CEOs needed that money to buy private jets) to wipe out any remaining credit we may still have.

It is up to you, proud consumer! Your country depends on you! No matter how dangerous it gets out there, you must go out and save America!

On the other hand, everything will likely go to hell no matter what we do. So, we might as well just relax, do our shopping at the liquor store and enjoy the season.

(Brandon Burt)


  1. Shop like your State depends on it, someone better buy stuff made in Utah, millions WON'T.

    Thank your elders, for P*ssing Off every sugar plum faerie in the country.

  2. Yes;
    it has been a well guarded secret that Utah's economic well being rests on the benevolence of homosexual consumers.
    The secret's out, and now doom looms.
    Kiss your children goodby,
    try to be brave here at the end...

  3. yeah you're RIGHT, gay folks don't shop, or have TWICE your disposable incomes...carry on, and happy holidays

  4. Even LGBTs and our friends and family members inside Utah don't have to spend THEIR money at shops inside Utah for the holidays. They can order online the same merchandise you want to sell them.

  5. Here's a fun idea -- boycott sweatshop goods this holiday season. Oh, and the rest of the year, too...or at least as often as you can. Buy local, buy American, buy fair trade.


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