Smaze

[Euphemistically Speaking] For some inexplicable reason, SLC television meteorologists insist on calling the sooty gunk that hangs in our air "haze." They've done it for as long as I can remember. I used to just blow it off.

But then we had last winter's unforgettable, near-endless inversion. And for the past several days we've been sitting under a high pressure system that is slowly turning the air into soup. Already. Can't wait till January.

I'm thinking it would help us get past our denial about global warming, our carbon footprint and all if our weather men and women could just say the word: SMOG. I mean, "haze" is such a nice little word. Sounds fresh and mellow, and rather feminine. Have chamber of commerce or tourism execs gotten to the TV stations? Have they they urged them to speak in euphemism around bad air? Wouldn't want to scare off potential visitors and conventioneers to this big, pea-soupy basin.

I watched Channel 5 weatherman Len Randolph do an extended forecast today. He predicts the "haze" will clear out late Sunday afternoon, when rain arrives. Ironically, as Randolph chattered on about haze, he stopped a couple of times in mid-sentence. He had to wheeze and cough. (Holly Mullen)