I'm thinking the brown protective wrapper was put over her head. And seeing how she admitted to being a shut-in, I think it's still there.
I read the letter and for the love of God, there is NO WAY that this is not satire. Seriously, who wrote this? Andy Borowitz? Stephen Colbert?People like this don't actually exist, right?
I think it's a joke. It's simply written too well to be serious. The part that gives it away is the "Mormon outing" thing. I suspect that, if the writer were being serious, she/he would have simply stated that it was a family outing and would have left out the funny underwear stuff and the like. Although, this does raise an interesting question. As Mormon's move into new times still awaiting the end of it all) becoming more hip and fashionable, will their designers (and I use that word loosely) create funny-unders that are modest-yet-sexy? You know, for those nights that mom and dad were actually able to get Jim, Joan, Moses, Zeke, Moroni and Eve to bed on time? "Hey, babe. The kids are asleep. You want for me to put on my 'special unders'?"
I've used a gym 4 or 5 days a week for 25 years. Without doubt, the most offensive thing I have seen are the dirty, dingy, gray magic undies these weirdo's wear. Honest to God, is it a Mormon thing not to use bleach?
Man, I wish I had a brown paper bag to cover up the LDS chucrches on every corner... blights on the landscape I tell ya! It's an affront to nature!
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