- He's shuffled off to Idaho, as speculated in Friday's Deseret News.
- He's undergoing experimental surgery to finally become a kitty.
- He's joined the touring company of Flintstones: The Musical.
- He finally snapped after the 5,934th spin of Bush's "Glycerin" and left to assassinate Gavin Rossdale.
Have a better one? Let's hear it ... (Bill Frost)