Wednesday, January 28, 2009

A Plea to Bruce Springsteen

[Utah Needs The Boss] 

Dear Bruce Springsteen: 

I see that you're firing up a new concert tour with the E Street Band this spring. Please, please, PLEASE come to Utah. I know you're probably still a bit miffed about failing to sell out the Delta Center back in May of 2000. I'm still embarrassed about that myself. It made us look like wusses. But despite being the reddest state in the Promised Land, we're not bad people. Really.

We have fry sauce. And not all of us have multiple wives. Some of us know black people. And gays. And the lyrics to "Rosalita."

As you, Boss, have pointed out yourself, with Barack Obama as our President, it's a whole new freakin' world. So let's wipe the slate clean and just forget about that little hiccup back in '00. I notice you're planning to play in Denver. Colorado's not so great either, FYI. Just ask the workers at Coors. I have to admit that Red Rocks is a pretty cool place. But we've got Energy Solutions ... oh, never mind. 

Utah has changed some since you were last here. In fact, by spring you might just be able to walk into a bar here and order a Long Island Ice Tea without being hassled by the State's alcohol gestapo. I know it sounds far-fetched, but it's POSSIBLE. And that's what your music is all about, right? POSSIBILITIES. 

It's not just about me. Think of my son. He's 9 years old now and still has never been to a Bruce Springsteen show. And let's face it: You're not getting any younger, dude. 

So just tell me it's possible that you'll think of us as you set out on your spring tour. For what it's worth, I went out and bought the new album yesterday, Working on a Dream. I didn't download a pirate copy. I could have, but I didn't. I'm not saying you owe me or anything... I'm just sayin' ... pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty please? Come see us in Utah. You won't regret it, maybe. 

By the way, did I mention you looked marvelous at the inauguration concert? 

(Ted Scheffler) 


  1. Ugh, maybe he can do an in-store at Wal-mart while he's here. I'm admittedly still bitter about his exclusive deal with them to release his greatest hits. Lame.

  2. The last time I saw Springsteen in concert in SLC I was thin enough to fit into some hot tiger-striped leggings for the show. I'd like to have him reappear in this town (even though critics are trashing his new release). I might even diet myself back into those pants! (If I could find them.)

  3. Holly,

    Forget Bruce; I'd pay just to see you in tiger-striped leggings!

  4. Heh.

    Ted, you made me lol. Thanks. :) Your sincerity and child-like desire for this to happen is just too precious.


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