No Show

[Music] So apparently Yeasayer didn't play as scheduled last night at In the Venue. According to one anonymous user, club officials failed to inform the public ahead of time that the band would not be appearing. This is all news to me. Does anyone know why the group didn't show? Anyone care to share their experience at the club? (Jamie Gadette)

Dead Zephyr: Week 232

Oooh, So Salacious

[Media] Oh, how I love to see the words "salacious," "Mayor Ralph Becker" and City Weekly all together in one letter to the editor.

And a tip of the Salt Blog hat to Salt Lake City letter writer Meredith Shaw, who clearly has adopted the Utah art form of passive-aggressive communication. Is she handing our paper a compliment? A criticism? Both at once? Who knows. The nature of too much discourse in Utah is that you never quite know where a person is coming from.

Oh well. Any pub is good pub.

Anyway, here at our little paper we'll continue to keep an eye on the Becker administration. We figure the new mayor, with nearly four months of work under his belt has long passed the obligatory Honeymoon Period. If press scrutiny of elected officials counts as "even salacious," we're guilty as charged.

BTW, no one does salacious better than competing New York tabloids the Daily News and New York Post, top right. Now those are headlines! (Holly Mullen)

The Passion of the McCain

[Video Game Arts]The University of Utah this Wednesday April 23 from 3:30-5:00 in the OSH Read auditorium will be holding its second annual machinema festival. What is machinema you ask? Well the U's press release says it's "machine cinema" where designers use video game style animations to create movies. Think of Grand Theft Auto style movie clips (except for that 'hot coffee' one, yer not gonna see that at this festival).

But the showcase will be showing a lot of cool video game style short movies at the festival and for free, the press release has a list of various U machinema movies here. And below is my favorite, "The Passion of the McCain" a poignant look at some behind the scenes love on the campaign trail that truly crosses the divide. (Eric S. Peterson)

Gull Trouble

[Theater Review] I had high hopes for Pinnacle Acting Company’s production of Chekhov's The Seagull. It is a great script, and I have been impressed by PAC’s work in the past (though I was unable to express my opinion to the public at the time, due to a confluence of human error and technical trouble).

The previous PAC production I saw (Someone Who'll Watch Over Me) did an excellent job of turning the constraints inherent in a fledgling company--mostly low budget and limited space--into advantages, as the bare stage and intimate environment served to highlight the tremendous talent of the three actors on stage. It was a remarkable piece of work, and it has bothered me ever since that I was unable to say so.

With their current production, however, they have neglected their strengths. It suffers from over-reach. By making do with cheesy sets and some sub-par performers, PAC does a disservice to the work.

Not that it was all bad, mind you. Some key players--notably Alexandra Harbold as Arkandina and Jared Larkin as her tortured artist son, Treplyev--were strong throughout. Others, like Morgan Long as Nina and Rob Luckau as Trigorin, did well in key scenes, but were otherwise unfocussed.

Yet I still look forward to another small piece from PAC’s core group. If the company can get on its feet with a few productions of more limited scale, I have no doubt that it’ll be up to bigger challenges soon enough. (Rob Tennant)

R U Bitter?

[Definitive Diatribe] In today's best daily newspaper commentary, syndicated columnist Robyn Blumner nails it. (Holly Mullen)

Short Skirts & Hot Wheels

[Roller Derby] The Salt City Derby Girls kicked off their 2008 roller derby season Saturday at the Utah Olympic Oval in front of 800-900 fans, clearly divided into red (for the Leave It To Cleavers) and green (for the 2007 SCDG champion Bomber Babes) factions. The Cleavers fans brought weaponry, while there was a lone cowbell on the Bombers' side--not exactly a fair matchup.

Went the other way on the track, however: The Bomber Babes dominated the bout for both 30-minute periods, led by in the superhuman jamming/scoring of NOS; the Leave It To Cleavers, skating with at least half new members (aka "fresh meat"), kept up best they could and got in some of the most brutal defensive hits (via blocker Miss Disco Bliss).

Final score: Bombers 144, Cleavers 89. Next bout: Saturday May 24 (Sisters of No Mercy vs. Death Dealers; tickets available through SLCDerby.com and SmithsTix.com. Please to enjoy these bout pix by Mark Alston:




(Bill Frost)

Torching it (Part II)

[Counter Protests] So somebody with a good eye spotted that the Global Human Rights Torch Relay will be this Sunday April 20, not that Saturday as I mentioned in the other blog. However Saturday will not be without its demonstrations.

In fact this Saturday April 20 at Library Square from 10 am to 2 pm, there will be a a Pro-Chinese Olympics demonstration from 10. The group will rally together with a number of Chinese student associations from the BYU, the U and others as well as numerous other Chinese Community organizations. These groups want to counter what they see as distorted accounts of China's reactions to the protests in Tibet.

The press release contends:

"We believe that the general public deserves to know the truth in its undistorted form. We respect the rights of peaceful expression of different views, but we condemn the plotted disruptions of the World Olympics and public orders.

We believe that the World Olympics belongs to the people of the entire world. It is an event where people of different nations, different ethnics, different religious backgrounds, and different societal systems meet in peace. It is an event where peace, mutual understanding, mutual respect, and friendship are fostered."

So if anyone is interested in getting thoroughly schooled in regards to the Olympics controversy you can attend both events which are located at nearly the same locations and in one weekend become more educated, and more globally active right here in the old SLC. (Eric S. Peterson)

Make Air Not War

The 2008 US Air Guitar Championships will make an appearance in Utah this summer! For those of you that think this is just a trend, the event has been going strong since 2003! Last year marked its strongest turnout, with 14 cities playing host to the dramatic onstage antics of air guitar heroes. No instruments will be harmed (or involved) in the performance scheduled to hit Avalon on June 20. Here's a taste of what's to come:

(Jamie Gadette)

The Senatorial Scene

[Hatchography] Sen. Orrin Hatch is so excited about John McCain's presidential bid, he was moved to compose a love song titled "Together Forever." (Apparently, Chris Matthews was quite enamored with it; The Trib broke the story late Thursday evening.)

I especially like the "destiny / history / majesty / all to see" rhymes. Very masculine.

While it's unclear in what sense Hatch "wrote" the song (dual credit goes to Philip Springer, who is most known for having cashed countless royalty checks over the past 50 years for the vaguely dirty Christmas favorite "Santa Baby"), the lyrics seem to have the soaring grandeur that Hatch is known for. How many states can boast such a multitalented statesman?

A McCain spokesman was suitably wowed: "We'll see Barack Obama's Bruce Springsteen endorsement and raise them an Orrin Hatch." Yeah, take that, Springsteen!

Something about the title, though ... wasn't it ... oh, yeah! Orrin, you got Rick-Rolled! (Brandon Burt)

Torching It!

[Protests] A peaceful march and human rights rally going on this weekend may be Utahns best chance to vent some frustration at the upcoming Beijing Olympics. With more and more news of egregious human rights violations stacking up against this summer's host of the 2008 Olympics, from arming genocidal rebels in Darfur to the iron-handed crackdown in Tibet, this weekend you can share outrage with community activists throwing their voice into a very loud chorus of people fed up with the actions of the Chinese government.

The Global Human Rights Torch relay event will start with a peaceful march this Sunday April 20 at 10:00 am at Washington Square (right by the county building at 451 South State). The march will be followed by guest speakers including Tswan Renzing, President of the Utah Tibetan Association, as well as a former falun gong prisoner of conscience and our own beloved activist, former Salt Lake City Mayor Rocky Anderson.

China may be the other side of the world as far as most Utahns might think but if you show up to the event Saturday some people will tell you why some things, even oceans away, can still hit pretty close to home. (Eric S. Peterson)

Those Other Polygamists

[Plyg-busters] The pro-Christian-polygamy folks over at TruthBearer.org are quick to point out that they have nothing, nothing to do with the FLDS plygs in El Dorado.

Mostly the TruthBearers object to the fact that the FLDS are kinda Mormony, whereas the TruthBearers advocate nothin' but that old-time Bible-based Christian polygyny. So much more sensible.

You'd think there'd be a hint of solidarity among religious polygamists. Mark Henkel, who is TruthBearer.org, takes an identity-politics approach to polygamy, saying that it will be the next big civil-rights battle. So you'd think he'd understand at least the political utility of coalition-building.

(Yes, many cringe at the alphabet soup of the "LGBTMNOPQ* community" but there is a reason all the Ls and the Bs and the Gs and the Qs and the Ts, etc., have decided to band together rather than trying to go it alone. It's because they share a common goal of achieving equal protection under the law, which is a political goal requiring expediency.)

But, no, as always with wacky Christians, their beliefs get in the way of their brains. It's typical for fundie Christians to denigrate Mormons (and Mormon-esque folks like the FLDS) for believing weird things.

Because, you know, that story about a god-man born to a virgin, who walked on water and got murdered but was raised from the dead before he flew up into the sky? And it's literally true? Soooo much more believable that that craaaazy tale about the American kid who met God in the forest.

Keep making those microdistinctions, TruthBearer.org--then keep wondering why Americans can't seem to get the message that there might, just possibly, be a religious basis for polygamy. (Brandon Burt)

Sticks, Bricks, Stones

[Best Reader Comment] The Deseret News' coverage of the first couple to sign up for Salt Lake City's mutual commitment registry elicited the predictable wave of wacky and rabid anti-gay responses.

My own favorite, from Lost in DC:

12:40 p.m. Apr. 17, 2008

The slope is getting more slippery. A torn tent provides shelter, a sturdy brick home provides shelter. Which provides better shelter? Call any combination a you want a "marriage", the traditional one man, one woman marriage is still and will always be the best, just as a sturdy brick house provides better shelter than a torn tent.

Myself, I prefer stucco. With a nice wrap-around porch. (Holly Mullen)

World Ends; Collapse of Marriage Imminent

[The Gays] Well, Brandie Balken and Lisa LeDuc have gone and done it. They're hitched now--at least as hitched as it is possible for same-sex couples to get in Salt Lake City.

The two became the first couple to sign up for Salt Lake City's "I Can't Believe It's Not a Domestic Partner Registry" registry, thus dooming us all to hellfire and incurring the inevitable wrath of idiots, mostly from out of town, who think it's their business to meddle in Balken-LeDuc family matters.

In all seriousness, though, it couldn't happen to a nicer couple. Brandie Balken is one of my favorite people in Salt Lake City; she's talented, friendly and just lovely on so many levels. (Mwa, Brandie!) Plus, she has cool initials.

So, congratulations to Brandie and Lisa, and as for the homophobic idiots--in your face, homophobic idiots! (Brandon Burt)

The Slow Death of Prog

[Music] The reason people hate 24-minute prog rock masterpieces isn't just because people suck, have no attention span, and deserve lives filled with empty, meaningless, brain-dead pop noise.

No. The reason people hate 24-minute prog-rock masterpieces is because of Science.

In a recent Morning News piece, Joshua Allen reveals scientists have discovered the perfect length for a pop song. It's two minutes, 42 seconds.

A difference of even one or two seconds may turn your perfectly catchy "Lovely Rita" (2:42) into a drag-ass "With a Little Help From My Friends" (2:44) or a hurried and underdeveloped "Good Morning Good Morning" (2:41).

Don't let this happen to your song! It's verse, verse, bridge, verse and fade out. None of this fancy leitmotif bullshit; no subtle shading or complex development and variation of thematic materials. Your listeners are busy people on the go, and if you can't give them their payoff in less than three minutes, they will go ... to some other band's CD release party. (Brandon Burt)

Popegasm 2008

[News] Of all the news (over)coverage of Pope Benedict XVI's visit to the US of A, only The Daily Show's is really necessary; allow us to simplify your media life with the clip below. Also, note President Dubya's eloquent assessment of Benedict's "awesome" speech and rejoice in Utah's continued approval of the Commander in Chief:



(Bill Frost)

OMG! U Can B in HSM3!

It's the Utah-filmed phenomenon that keeps on giving--and now it's giving to a local school. Rowland Hall-St. Mark's, partnering with the SLC Film Center, will be auctioning off eight opportunities to appear as an extra in the soon-to-be-shot High School Musical 3: Senior Year, in addition to other personalized and autographed gear related to the film. The link goes live tomorrow (April 18) from the Rowland Hall-St. Mark's Website, with the auction running through Friday, April 25. Funds raised will support both the school and the SLC Film Center, and you might get to snuggle up to Zac, Vanessa or Corbin. Or see them from a distance at the craft services table, same diff. (Scott Renshaw)

Bioterrorists Beware!

54-year-old Tom Tholen will be facing federal charges April 29 for "misprision of felony" which means he failed to report a crime. The crime is related to the activities of the wanna-be bio- terrorist Roger Bergendorff. A man who last February had been playing around with creating the toxic substance ricin and accidentally exposed himself to the chemical and wound up hospitalized in a comatose state for four weeks.

The bare facts of the story gave everybody goosebumps and warranted the mobilization of countless federal agents from Homeland Security to the FBI to scour the mans Vegas strip hotel as well as the site of his Riverton storage unit, looked after by his cousin Tholen.

In the end what was discovered is that this miscreant turned out to be an out of work, formerly alcoholic graphic design artist. His apartment at the time was only shared by a few cats (who may soon be charged with conspiracy).

Although Tholen alerted authorities to the whole incident when he reported vials of what may have been ricin to the motel clerk, Tholen has apparently not cooperated enough and is now going to trial because of it.

Undoubtedly the Bergendorff character was unstable and even possibly dangerous (if even only to himself) but the fact that his cousin Tholen is being brought up on charges of failing to report his cousin's "suspicious" activities years ago, smacks of a costly multi-departmental, multi-agency investigation clamoring to harvest some fruits from a very costly investigation.

Nothing wrong with being prepared for bio-terrorism, of course, but overemphasizing the spectre of the fear-inspiring bug--whether it's ricin, anthrax or whatever doesn't serve our country's interest. It's easy to forget that our worst terrorist attack was not committed by chemicals, or even bombs, so much as it was simply men with fake IDs and box cutters. (Eric S. Peterson)

Uh, Where Are All the Men?

[Plyg-busters] It's day 14 since Texas authorities raided the YFZ Ranch in Eldorado, taking 400-plus children of polygamist parents in the process.

Tomorrow, a custody hearing unprecedented in its scope will take place in nearby San Angelo to determine whether any or all the kids should enter foster care while the state continues its investigation into child abuse allegations.

And in all the reams of news stories, miles of broadcast video and blog postings on the topic, I've wondered all along: Where are the men?

If everything is so spit-polished clean and safe at the YFZ, if women (scary Stepford Wives that they are on camera) are free to come and go as they please, if the children live in wholesome goodness, if all of this is true--where are the men to say so?

Real men who have nothing to hide would defend their women, protect their children and stand up for themselves. But they don't. What kind of man would pimp his wife/wives in the way these polygamists have for the international news media, and not absorb at least some of the scrutiny themselves? Must be some kind of special priesthood that allows these big men to hide so expertly behind their women. (Holly Mullen)

Do You Like Doin' It?

So do we ... Doin' It at the Park, that is. The annual all-ages outdoor event hosted by Uprok Records has been going strong for three years now, attracting all walks of life who dig a little sun with their emcees, DJs, breakdancing and beatboxing battles. Turns out, however, not everyone is a fan. Uprok recently learned that the health department denies its application for Doin' It 2008 style, citing rampant noise complaints. Strange, considering the drum circle is still going strong. Apparently that kind of noise is kosher. Officials did offer to let Uprok move Doin' It adjacent to the circle, with no shelter or proper dance floor. Right, that's a great solution. This news comes just weeks after Red Light Books was ordered to shut down its all-ages music venue, a ruling that drummed up bad memories of Kayo's final concert throwing days. What's up Salt Lake City "deciders"? What next? You're sending the wrong message to kids searching for a healthy, peaceful outlet. Some of my best, most constructive years as a teenager took place at all-ages venues. If anyone cares to save Doin' It, contact Uprok to see if there's anything you can do to help reverse the decision--or maybe find another location for the festivities.

(Jamie Gadette)