Watch out, Gov. Huntsman. Conservatives are watching you, and they don't like what they see.
Feb. 6, 2009 marked the 98th anniversary of President Ronald Reagan's birthday, and 30 U.S. governors commemorated the occasion by proclaiming it "Ronald Reagan Day." You might think that reddest-of-red-states Utah would be among them, but you'd be wrong. Huntsman opted not to heed the call of the Ronald Reagan Legacy Project -- and RRLP chairman Grover Norquist ain't happy.
Of course, how not-happy he is depends on the party affiliation of the governor. In a press release, Norquist said of Huntsman, a Republican, "It is deeply regrettable Governor Jon Huntsman has failed to recognize the great contribution of Ronald Reagan." But when commenting on the same decision as made by Wisconsin Democrat Jim Doyle, Norquist alliterated, "By refusing to honor President Reagan, Gov. Jim Doyle has put pusillanimous petty partisanship above patriotism."
It's good to know that Norquist -- a close associate of Jack Abramoff and a guy who once analogized the estate tax to the Holocaust -- is above such pusillanimous petty partisanship. (Scott Renshaw)
[Economy]An anonymous commenter responded to my post about bankers justifying their big bonus checks only weeks after the industry successfully milked Congress for a huge taxpayer-funded bailout:
What if Larry's firm wasn't bailed out by the government and he made budget? He did his job: Why should he not be compensated as before?
Main Street seems to have a misconception about Wall Street bonuses. Bonuses aren't gifts: they are the major part of the overall compensation package and people work very hard for them. Wall Street traders in general are underpaid on their salaries and the firms use the bonuses as both carrot and stick. When you do well, bonuses are up, and vice versa. That is the contract.
If Anonymous hasn't seen the classic psychodrama Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?, I highly recommend it. In one memorable scene, the paraplegic Blanche Hudson (Joan Crawford) tearfully protests, "You wouldn't be able to do these awful things to me if I weren't still in this chair!"
To which Baby Jane (Bette Davis) Hudsons' wonderfully callous response is: "But cha are, Blanche! Ya are in that chair!"
In this allegory, Blanche represents the crippled banking industry, Baby Jane symbolizes the taxpayers, and Elvira is, oh, let's say, the illegal immigrants. Whatever. But nobody can carry off an eye-roll like Bette Davis can carry off an eye-roll!
Anonymous started out his/her whole post with a big subjunctive "what if." What if Larry's firm hadn't been bailed out? (But it was, Blanche!) What if I, as a taxpayer, weren't faced with paying off a series of multibillion-dollar bailouts for the rest of my life? (But I am, Blanche!)
But, if I weren't, would I still complain about hordes of bank executives cashing bonus checks that dwarf my own annual salary? Well, let me think about it. Even before the bailouts became necessary, I often griped about the widening income gap that separates normal people like us from the few, the proud, the elite superrich.
So let's, for a moment, close our eyes and imagine a world in which the taxpayers hadn't been ... uh, "asked" to step in and bail out a bunch of wealthy fatcats for their hubris, shortsightedness and arrogance in looting the treasury for eight years and crashing the almighty economy. I'm visualizing as we speak. (Om mani padme hum...) The vision is a bit fuzzy, but reception is clearing up by the moment ... better now ... almost there ...
... aaaaand, here it is, crystal clear: that imaginary world where the bailout doesn't exist. And here I am in that world thinking about bloated corporate salaries and bonuses. And, why ... it almost seems ... well, yes! Of course I would complain. After all, they're only a bunch of semiliterate, entitled frat-boy MBAs who regard salaries in the low six figures as "slumming."
Frankly, I was a big fan of democracy while it lasted, so the fact that a small coterie of wealthy elitists were able to take the reins and dispose of the middle class in a few short decades kinda chaps my hide. Yep, sure I'd complain about those bonuses.
But--returning now to reality--there's a whole world of bitterness between that hypothetical kind of complaining and the long and loud, resentful, heartfelt bellyaching of which I find myself capable now that I've been elected to actually foot the bill for those MBAs' bonuses.
Even if, as Anonymous says, the bonuses are really to be considered part of the bankers' and traders' "compensation packages," what of it? If that's the case, then, in effect, I have suddenly assumed responsibility for paying some random corporate suit's cable and gas bills.
It's as if I've suddenly adopted an Ethiopian child, but he's got nicer clothes and a higher standard of living than mine, and he doesn't ever write or send pictures, and I don't even get a hug from Sally Struthers. If we ever were to meet (ah, that subjunctive mood again!), it's doubtful that we'd find anything in common to talk about.
But, if I'm going to have a pet stockbroker, I'd appreciate it if he'd drop by once in awhile--at least to do something useful like scaring mice out of the kitchen or barking at the mail carrier.
Traders are under a lot of pressure to not only do well but to increase production by at least 10% yearly. Perhaps a better model would be to increase the salaries and decrease the bonuses so that there is less drama and more stability on incomes.
Sure, sure, they've got stressful jobs. Don't we all. I'd like to see how my pet trader holds up in a copy editor's slot on a production day prior to publication of a special issue. Then we'll see how he handles "stress." Once he earns my paycheck, he might think twice about appropriating 30 percent of it to fund 15 minutes of his next two-week trip to Tuscany.
To sum it up, Anonymous, many of us working stiffs are willing to believe that these bailouts are necessary. It seems reasonable that, through scrupulous and selective use of this huge infusion of cash, the best minds in the various economic industries could find a way to jumpstart the economy. After all, we want the country, and the world, to get back on good financial footing as soon as possible. That's why we didn't riot in the streets when the Emergency Economic Stimulus Act went through.
But, as long as the bankers and traders and MBAs are in that chair--as long as we're not only suffering from the results of their bad decisions but even cheerfully subsidizing them--they'd best accept our largess with a bit of gratitude, dump that attitude of entitlement and reign in their most conspicuous personal habits for awhile.
[News-ish] Finally, a report we can all trust on polygamy, courtesy Pauly Shore (you may remember him from such cinematic milestones as Bio-Dome and Jury Duty):
[News] Of all the news (over)coverage of Pope Benedict XVI's visit to the US of A, only The Daily Show's is really necessary; allow us to simplify your media life with the clip below. Also, note President Dubya'seloquentassessment of Benedict's "awesome" speech and rejoice in Utah's continued approval of the Commander in Chief:
[Follow-up] Salt Lake County District Attorney Lohra Miller did not respond to City Weekly’s requests for comment for a story that ran in the 3/20 paper, but issued the following statement to several other media outlets:
"I am very proud and honored to be elected by the people of Salt Lake County to be their District Attorney. My staff and I have made great progress in reorganizing and reforming this office, including our efforts in prosecuting domestic violence and alcohol-related offenses.
"Unfortunately, public officials are sometimes forced to face accusations that may be used to distort and misrepresent their lives. Those accusations, whether initiated for personal or political motives and regardless of the manner in which they are made, distract us all from continuing our important work. I will not let that happen. I will continue to ensure that criminals in our community are aggressively prosecuted."
[SLWeekly.com Exclusive] It's past midnight and all the house lights are dimmed in a faceless South Jordan neighborhood. All the houses, that is, except one. There's a party going on. Young people noisily come and go at this McMansion set in an otherwise sleepy cul-de-sac. Vehicles fill the home’s driveway and line the narrow streets. At 4 a.m., one neighbor, awakened by the sound of slamming car doors, has had enough and begins to call the police.
But she doesn't.
She's been down this path before. This party is taking place March 14, 2008, at the home of Lohra Miller, Salt Lake County district attorney. On Nov. 6, 2007, Miller angrily denounced as “lies” allegations she condoned underage drinking, operated a secret law firm and ran an unlicensed day care, all inside her home. Utah Attorney General Mark Shurtleff cleared Miller of the allegations. Shurtleff must not have looked very hard.
The parties at Miller’s place died down after neighbors’ complaints attracted attention from the press and authorities late last year, next-door neighbor Jen Zielinski says. But now the neighbor claims it’s back to every weekend ...Read the rest of the story here>>
[Celebrity News]If you have Internet connection and/or work in an office, you've probably already heard the news. What I want to know is how this development impacts us regular joes. Yes, it's sad. But why do we, myself included, get so teary-eyed over folks we don't actually know (beyond their roles in arguably significant films)? It's not exactly the day the music died.
Let's hear it folks. What, if anything, did Heath mean to you? (Jamie Gadette)
[News] This week's City Weekly includes a news story updating the activities of several of 2007's cover feature profiles. Among the updates was cyber-squatter Robert Paisola. While doing research on Paisola's latest shenanigins, it transpired that he and another recent cover subject, Black Chandelier founder and designer Jared Gold, have something in common. Namely the apparently defunct fashion magazine Rene.
This free Salt Lake City-based glossy bi-monthly debuted in January, supposedly had a second issue, then vanished from sight. If you visit Rene's abandoned MySpace site you find Gold listed as a contributing writer. Paisola is featured under the executive team, listed as director of international operations. He's wearing an extraordinarily colorful shirt and a wide grin.
Quite how you interpret that grin is an intriguing question. Paisola loves the camera, no matter who's behind the lens. He's got a new sex offenders registry photo up on the state Website and it displays exactly, but exactly the same white-toothed grin. (Stephen Dark)
[Media] Today, HuffingtonPost.com launched its comedy sister site, 236.com: "23/6: Some of the News, Most of the Time." It's headed up by a guy who spent six years as a writer for The Daily Show, so it oughta be hilarious stuff, right? Well, here's one bit ...
"Pack of cigarettes has added you as a friend on Facebook: The system will allow Facebook members to share their favorite products (Natural Ice, condoms, etc.) with their friends, and even allow companies to create Facebook profiles for the products themselves, that users can then 'befriend.' And who wouldn't love to share a few laughs with a bag of Doritos?" Wacky graphic here.
And that's one of the funnier entries. Maybe because I swear I've read it before, but it was about MySpace. Maybe 23/6 will get better. Maybe you should stick with The Onion or The Daily Show. Maybe I should get back to work ... (Bill Frost)
