Survivor: V-Necks Ahoy

[Locals on Reality TV] Survivor: Toncantins premiered on CBS last night, and guess what? The Utah guy isn't the most annoying contestant! (That would be "Coach.") Lindon's Tyson Apostol does, however, have a penchant for V-neck shirts which is either 1. a clever ruse to hide his true he-man abilities, or 2. just plain disturbing. Meet Tyson:





(Bill Frost)

Rock of Love Bus: Party Time!

[Locals on Reality TV] Salt Laker Kelsey survived another cut on Bret Michaels' Rock of Love Bus this weekend, even though she was on the losing team in a stage tear-down challenge (no, VH1 isn't even trying to come up with new material anymore). Kel got a special cell call from Bret himself to come rock VIP style onstage and at the after party, while her fellow losers were stuck up in the cheap seats (which are still pretty good, since the Bret Michaels Band ain't exactly playing stadiums).

Here's Kelsey explaining that AARP member Bret had to skip the after party because he was too pooped after rocking onstage for a whole hour. Naturally, drama ensues ...

VH1 TV Shows Music Videos Celebrity Photos News & Gossip

(Bill Frost)

Still On the Bus

[Locals on Reality TV] Is this good news or bad news? Salt Lake City's Kelsey Lee is still in the running to hook-up with a puffy '80s rock star 20 years her senior on basic cable TV! Hey, at least he's not an FLDS prophet, right?

The Huka Bar waitress has had little screen time as of yet on VH1's Rock of Love Bus, but did make the coming repulsions, er, attractions reel for next Sunday's episode, wherein the Bus heads to Champagne, Illinois: "I don't know where Champagne is, but I'll drink the bottle! Woo!"

Will Kelsey stay on the Bus, doing Utah proud and eventually just doing Bret Michaels? Stay tuned! Or not ... (Bill Frost)

Ryan Seacrest Wants to Meet Your Mom

[Reality Hell] Just when you thought Reality TV production (excluding MTV) couldn't sink any lower, here comes Momma's Boys--from NBC and Ryan Seacrest! And they're casting in Salt Lake City! The Very Important Message from NBC casting, who are only looking for "good-looking, fun guys," so all you homely, dull dudes can just move along to The Biggest Loser:

"I was told this was THE magazine of Salt Lake City by our NBC affiliate in town. We will be in town from October 1st to October 6th. We will be hold casting events at the following locations:

Thursday, October 2nd:
9:30 am- 10:30 am - Curves - 2142 S. Highland dr. Salt Lake City

9pm - 11pm - Studio 600 - 26 E. 600 S. Salt Lake City

10pm - 12pm - Green Street - 602 E 500 South Salt Lake City

12am - 1:30pm - SkyBar - 161 W 600 S Salt Lake City

Saturday, October 4th
10pm - 12am - Huka Bar - 151 E 6100 S Salt Lake City"

In case you'd like to know exactly what you're auditioning for (an afterthought for most reality-TV hopefuls), read these:

THE magazine? KSL 5 knows we exist? (Bill Frost)

Real World Gaydar

[Locals on Reality TV] MTV's 235th season of The Real World is being filmed in Brooklyn, NY, and counts a Utahn among the cast! And yes, he's apparently a Mormon. Ever-reliable gossip website Gawker.com, however, has serious questions:

"His name is Chet and he is Mormon and, though he's engaged to a young lady back home in Salt Lake City (a city name that celebrates a barren nothingness of a lake whose only inhabitants are brine shrimp and brine flies), the producers want him to get laid. Because he's a virgin! Could you be the lucky girl (or guy)???

"Again, his name is Chet. He's a Mormon with 'spiky blonde hair.' On the evening that the NY Press caught up with him, he was wearing an H&M scarf and 'Elvis Costello glasses,' and was drinking a Shirley Temple. He apparently loves glam rock and was 'gushing' when some slinky male rocker put something around his neck and whispered in his ear. And, yes, he is engaged (as all Mormons are, from birth. That's just science). But, um, doesn't that above description sound a little well, um, un-fishy, if you catch my brine shrimp drift? So who's going to fuck this kid? Will youuuuu? The above photo, from NewYorkology, seems to offer the best known glimpse of the mysterious Mormon."

Oh, dear ... (Bill Frost)

Dill or No Dill

[Locals on Reality TV] One week from tonight, Last Comic Standing runner-up Marcus will film a big-deal comedy concert special in Ogden; he struck the deal after his LCS exposure due to the fact that he was actually funnier and more talented than the "winner" America "voted for." My local media blackout conspiracy still stands, because ...

Last night, Sandy housewife Jessica Robinson won on NBC's Deal or No Deal, a show that requires no talent beyond pointing at a suitcase and putting up with Howie Mandel. Sure, she's the series' first million-dollar winner--but she'll also being using the money to move the hell out of Utah ASAP. For this, she gets the front page of the Salt Lake Tribune and instantaneous KSL 5 coverage.

Meanwhile, Marcus, who never got either, still claims Zion as home and insisted on filming his concert special here. Just sayin.'

Jessica's Dill or No Dill moment:



(Bill Frost)

Kittens & Keith

[Locals on Reality TV] SLC's Slippery Kittens are still on America's Got Talent; Filthy Gorgeous' Keith Bryce has been voted off Project Runway. The judges on both reality-competition shows had little nice to say about either--"Are you Pamela Anderson's mom?" (That was directed to a Slippery Kitten, not Keith).

The respective vids:







(Bill Frost)

Comics & Kittens

[Locals on Reality TV] Update: SLC's Marcus came in second on Last Comic Standing, Slippery Kittens Burlesque advanced to the next round on America's Got Talent, and I still couldn't care less about So You Think You Can Dance?, a show I watched 10 seconds of last night and felt at least 10 percent dumber for it. We all know I can't afford that.

The Slippery Kittens perform next in Salt Lake at the Bar Deluxe on Saturday, Aug. 16; Marcus hits Wiseguys in Ogden (Saturday) and WVC (Sunday) this weekend. Don't expect to see him ever again on Fox 13, who last night had the post-show balls to run a "We knew him when" package of clips from his previous morning fill-ins after ignoring their "bud" for months. Guess corporate Fox synergy is more important than supporting one of your own on "another" network.

The bittersweet clip from last night's Comic:



(Bill Frost)

Marcus! Was! Robbed!

[Locals on Reality TV] He made it to the Final 2, but SLC's Marcus lost to Iliza Schlesinger on Last Comic Standing--who knew America was ready to vote in a woman?

Marcus is still our man, however--he'll be at Wiseguys in Ogden and West Valley City this weekend before going on the LCS tour. Go show him the love, and please don't mention David Archuleta.

Now, we'll see if the Slippery Kittens can stay on America's Got Talent ... (Bill Frost)

Project Dullway

[Locals on Reality TV] Blame it on the earlier timeslot, blame it on Project Runway overdose (like, six seasons will air this year) or blame it on the dullest outing yet for the Bravo once-hit--ratings are down, no matter how bitchy the contestants get.

SLC's Keith Bryce has kept a low profile on Project Runway thus far; so much so that, if he gets eliminated soon, viewers might ask, "Who's that guy? I haven't seen him in a sewing-room catfight." He survived this week to maybe make a future splash--behold the recap (don't blink or you'll miss him):



As for the local So You Think You Can Dance? contestants ... couldn't care less. However, tonight's the night for Marcus on NBC's Last Comic Standing--and you'll only read about it here! Ha! Marcus on last week's episode:



(Bill Frost)

Where Dem Kittens?

[Locals on Reality TV] It's been over a month since Salt Lake City's Slippery Kittens Burlesque made the first cut on NBC's America's Got Talent. Since then, it's been nothin' but week after week of auditions--we're pretty sure that America's talent (such as it is) has been sufficiently gotten.

Will Miss Lorrie and the ladies finally be back on the TV box tonight? Dunno. David Hasselhoff and his fellow American Idol-knockoff judges might still be in the audition stages. According to NBC, it's "week seven of this hit variety competition series, which features contestants who submitted their auditions online via MySpace." Oh, great.

Maybe an NBC/Universal/SLC convergence is in order: Get the Kittens together with Last Comic Standing's Marcus and Project Runway's Keith Bryce--it'll be a good ol' Vaudeville show, and Bryce can make the costumes! This idea is mine, Hollywood! (Bill Frost)

Carry On, Keith

[Locals on Reality TV] SLC's Keith Bryce survived another round of Bravo's Project Runway last night, despite designing a hideous "green" dress (as in, environmentally green) from materials selected by his model. So far, Bryce hasn't had much screen time, probably because he's just not as flamboyantly obnoxious as, say, Suede (yes, that's his name) or the 80-year-old rocker chick who only wants to work with leather (much like her face). Here's Bryce--he's the one in the blue bandana and black tank:



(Bill Frost)

Make It Happen, People

[Locals on Reality TV] The latest season of Bravo's Project Runway, one of the very few reality TV shows that actually produce anything, premiered last night--and Salt Lake City designer Keith Bryce (of Filthy Gorgeous) didn't get cut! He also didn't get a lot of screen time; the clip below (Keith in the white wife-beater) is pretty much the most you saw of him. But, there's always next week!



(Bill Frost)

Slippery Kittens Meet The Hoff

[Locals on the TV Box 2] In case you missed America's Got Talent last night (KSL News obviously did, as we predicted), here are the ladies of SLC's Slippery Kittens Burlesque giving the country and David Hasslehoff an eyeful:



(Bill Frost)

Shake Those Ta-Ta-Talents

[Locals on the TV Box] We hear tonight's 8 p.m. season premiere of NBC's America's Got Talent (which more often then not actually proves the opposite) will feature an appearance by Salt Lake City's own Slippery Kittens Burlesque--not that you'd read it in the "more local-er than you" daily.

How far the ladies--who will be hosting a viewing party tonight at Bar Deluxe at 666 S. State--will or won't advance on the freak, er, talent show remains mystery, as does the fate of SLC comic Marcus on NBC's Last Comic Standing. Even more cloudy, will affiliate KSL 5 even acknowledge the progress of the locals on these reality shows (almost mandatory anymore--just ask American Idol 'hos Fox 13)? Or will the tats and tits prove too much for Eyewitness News to bear?

More importantly, how did David Hasslehoff vote? Tune in tonight, or go to Bar Deluxe for the full 3-D (if not double-D) experience. (Bill Frost)

Your Local Media Is a Joke

[News-ish] After weeks and weeks of relentless, ass-pounding David Archuleta/American Idol coverage ("Archie's first zit! Tonight at 10!"), you'd think the local media would be ready to hitch onto the next Utahn-does-reality-TV wagon, right?

Today, not a Single. Damn. Word. about Salt Lake City comedian Marcus (just Marcus, he dropped the "Man of 1,000 Voices" suffix) making the first cut and moving onto the next round of NBC's Last Comic Standing last night. Nothing. Guess working on the road for years and actually writing your own material is no dues-paid match for being a cute Mormon high-schooler with a squeaky voice.

Not that last night's LCS footage reflected Marcus' comedy material; NBC went with his impressive menagerie of voices. Not everyone can do a conversation between the entire Family Guy cast in a single breath, but those of us who've seen Marcus' entire act know there's more to him than that. Let's hope he survives on the series long enough show it.

Here's NBC's 2-minute recap of last night; that's Marcus toward the end in Phoenix, with the tats and Captain America T-shirt:



(Bill Frost)

They Still Make Newspapers?

[TV] Hard to believe a docu-soap set behind the scenes of a high school newspaper--Cyprus Bay High School’s The Circuit, in this case--would be remotely interesting, but The Paper wins entertainment points for hyper-earnestness (“Journalism is the most important job in the world!”) and WTF? hyperbole (“This is the Vietnam of newspapers!”). The latter refers to the epic, tearful battle to become The Circuit’s editor-in-chief, a job these teens should later learn, if the newspaper industry still exists by then, no one wants. Super-serious.

The Paper debuts tonight on MTV, and it's exactly the way things are behind the scenes at City Weekly--here's a taste:



(Bill Frost)

Hip-Hop: From SLC to TV

[Radio & TV] Another reality show? Oh yeah. Now, even Salt Lake City hip-hop station U92 has its own behind-the-scenes series--well, sort of.

A pilot that "follows the drama of the only hip-hop station in one of the most conservative states in the country. Viewers will finally see what happens when the microphones are turned off and how a radio station in Utah is breaking new music before major cities such as Los Angeles and New York City" has been produced; The Station is now being pitched to networks. If the writers' strike continues, could happen--and, even though the premise seems a bit thin to support a weekly series, the characters seen here could carry it. Easily.

The Station pilot:


So, why does the logo look like a middle-finger salute? (Bill Frost)