[Media] A little more than a month has passed since KSL-Channel 5 anchorman/god Dick Nourse retired amid weeks of ballyhoo and buildup to the final broadcast.Retirement benefits at Bonneville International Corp. (mother ship of KSL television and radio) must not be so hot. Either that, or Dick really did realize his worst fears about joining the pasture of retired talking heads: he's bored and beside himself and has too much time on his hands.
Nourse has recently become a shill for some wacked-out, survivalist, nutritional supplement company called Lifecaps. And you can go here to hear that famous Nourse booming baritone hawking pills that he calls a "revolutionary food capsule that could save your life" in the event of a natural disaster or other sign of the coming apocalypse.
Radio ads running on--where else--KSL, feature Nourse's testimonial: "I'm Dick Nourse. For 40 years I've covered every natural disaster and scientific breakthrough know to man..." And then he launches off into description of this "survival capsule" that could save your life.
Lifecaps Web site is just this side of tin-foil hat territory, and is tough to navigate. Can't discern where the home office is, and the company founder offers a long and rambling discourse of his amazing nutritional "inventions." But--sweet!--there's a certain Utah County scam charm to the whole thing. According to Nourse, the pills are "completely caffeine free," and if you "have 15 percent of body fat or more you could live off Lifecaps and water for days, maybe even weeks."
So that takes in about 90 percent of Utah County residents, eh?
Hmm. Apparently no one ever told Dick how fiercely a local legend must protect his "brand." I must say I pictured him pitching something more along the lines of life insurance or reverse mortgages, ala Robert Wagner or Wilford Brimley. (Photo courtesy of KSL.com)
(Holly Mullen)
