The Kids Have Spoken

[Who Will Win on Nov. 4?] The 2.2 million kids who voted in Nickelodeon's "Kids' Vote" in its 2008 Kids Pick the President know how to pick 'em. Since 1988, Nickelodeon's "Kids' Vote" has correctly predicted the winner in four out of the last five U.S. presidential races.
Fifty-one percent (1,167,087) chose Sen. Barack Obama and 49 percent (1,129,945) voted for John McCain.
It remains to be seen if young voters over 18 will be as motivated as their younger siblings to vote if they have to traipse down to polls and study the election pamphlet and not just click their mouse online and vote the way Mom and Dad do.
But if you want even more assurance as to the rightness of the kids' vote, it is comforting to note that even astrologers favor Mr. Obama.
Yet, it's odd: all predictions point to a tight race. How is that even possible? Why aren't Democrats running away with this thing? (Jerre Wroble)

Jamie Lynn Spears Spawns

[Teen Spawning] Old fart that I am, I was listening to the news on KSL radio this morning. Some national entertainment reporter was all a go-go about Jamie Lynn Spears, Britney's 16-year-old sister. Jamie Lynn is pregnant. But you knew that.

This being a day-after the news broke story, the reporter had to put a consumer-friendly spin on it. She found a psychologist. The question was what should a parent tell a 10-year-old daughter who loves Jamie Lynn that her TV hero is knocked up? Teen idols being knocked off pedestals and all, I guess.

"It's a very difficult situation for parents..." said the shrink, and she psychobabbled on.

It's doesn't seem so hard. I'd try this: "Don't be acting like that fake-baked slut and go out getting pregnant at 16 and bringing a baby home for me to raise."

(Holly Mullen)